LoL: A Farewell To Cheap Getwaways

Well, I got on the League today and found that something I had been fearing for the last month has finally come true: the refunding of Dodge runes. For everyone except me, this is most likely a good thing, but have you ever stopped to think about what has happened?

Well, League of Legends is a bit more fair now, Jax could be a monster to kill....

but I lost what I loved most! My ability to dodge random attacks! One time, by the undying power of the lulz gods, I dodged Cait's ultimate. The rage the followed was enough to kill 20 men. To this day I have no idea how I exactly managed to do this feat. Maybe Riot thought, that'd be pretty funny if that kid just made that Cait explode with rage.

Dodging was an odd ability. With my measly 6.75% dodge, I did manage to avoid a good bit of damage. It basically blocks out 6.75% of all melee attack damage, when you consider, because 6.75% of attacks automatically miss. This gives the advantage to someone in a team fight, or when you just so happen to run away (I can't tell you the number of times I've been called a hacker when avoiding melee attacks and running)

Now we find ourselves at the beginning of a new era, an era where I can no longer just parry blows with no thought at all. The rise of new runes, and a completely revised way of playing. I've been using dodge runes for half a year, and I say now that I will deeply miss all of the times I pissed off Teemo.

Well, I guess I'm going to have to buy something defensive-- stupid Banshee's Veil costing so much gold.

But nothing feels better than avoiding a Cho'Gath feast, eh?

However something does hang on my mind, and its mostly within Riot's recent updates. Saying this I mean that we have seen about 10 new champions with only one major change, being the Jungle in Classic. With the rise of season 2, I can only stop to wonder if the League is moving too quickly. I seem to only be really good at Dominion, but there's no championship for that. I'd love to see more features (Like a new gametype and Voice Chat which could be implemented in 2012) since Dominion, although very fun, isn't very good for some champions. Riot certainly is on the right track, and has achieved magic with this game, its not very often that I have multiple games that I want to play at the same time, and the League has kept me on my toes for the last couple months. I can only hope that Riot will stop to think that maybe a champion every week is maybe a bit too much, and will instead put a little more time into actual gameplay, and not champions. God forbid we get another release like Volibear, super OP or a champion like Rumble, who I haven't seen played in just about 100 games. Just something to think about.

--Santa

LoL + TF2: Arms and Stockings

So much to cover so little time until TF2 is done updating! So, where to start, dwellers of the internet? How about with some quick League updates?

Looking to your right you’ll notice a cute little comic put out by Riot just yesterday…. Or ___ amount of days, depending on your point of reading. This is showing of the new champion: Viktor—the Machine Herald. You know Blitzcrank? This guy made him. And he’s probably all Russian and stuff, like a bad-ass Tesla. I can’t wait to try this bad boy out.

And, to show use their undying love, Valve has announce not only the great Steam giveaways that they always have, but their also flaunting around their giving junk. You get a free secret Saxton (Unless your FTP, noob) and a stocking stuffer. Just for being great. Its times like this that I’m glad I’ve spent 535 hours playing the greatest game ever. That’s right, I’m de-throning Skyrim, I’m just in love with TF2.  But, as for the Steam stuff going on, you can complete some challenges for a chance to win every game on Steam.

Every.

Game.

My god, I gotta say, I could have a hernia with excitement. But, I have to wait for that, until then, enjoy yourself, I got to get back to trading.

--Santa

PS; Check out my new wallpaper. <3 Valve

Movie: Playing in the Shadows

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT.

Good morning/evening ladies and gentlemen of the internet. I hope you all had an interesting weekend. I know I did. Oh TF2, you always know how to drag a boy back in. But that’s beside the point!  I went to see a movie this weekend, and IM NOT GOING TO TELL YOU WHICH ONE. Look to your left, No, MY LEFT. ON THE SCREEN. That one.   Yeah, I have to admit, this one was something I had been planning on seeing for the last few days, months, since they announced it. I’m the first to admit: I’m a very big fan of Robert Downey Jr. but, I was worried, I usually trust rotten tomatoes, and with an approval of only 60% (85% f movie goers enjoyed it) It still managed to bring in 40 million dollars, I’m personally glad to have contributed .00005375% of that. But, before I go on, I’d like to explain my grading system, going from 1-10.

1.       Not viewable, the person responsible has committed a criminal offense, and will spend 35 years in jail without any chance of parole.
2.       License to make literature/movies/songs revoked
3.       Eyes/ears bleeding
4.       Some form of a plot, it’s almost a comedy how bad the acting is
5.       Disappointing, can understand where some people could possibly like it
6.       Chuckle here and there, but overall, it’s a mess
7.       Average, nothing memorable. Nothing really bad.
8.       Interesting, okay plot/acting etc… Enjoyable
9.       Wonderful, suspenseful, believable. A piece good enough to buy.
10.   Perfect- engage fan boy mode. Impossibly good.
11.   Perfect. Absolutely nothing wrong with the piece, at the point of viewing you ascent to heaven to be with the greats such as Mark Twain, Gandhi, etc…

To give you some examples: Shawshank Redemption is a 9.75, TF2 is a 10, and the Harry Potter series is an 8.5 (both the movies and books.) With this grading system in mid, I’ll give a slight synopsis:

The movie starts with a very glorious Chinaman, who ends up being the quite enjoyable Downy Jr. who goes onto beat up a bunch of guys using is super-brain powers. Watson is getting married, and Holmes is to be the best man. But, with Europe at the brink of war, and an evil professor having a stranglehold over many industries, can Holmes stop the inevitable?

The story is set remarkably well in the past, and has a lot of charm, a grand twisting ending and the use of everything in the movie ends with an enjoyable experience. I gave it an 8.75, just not quite to 9, and not as good as I was hoping for. Although, I did enjoy it more than the original. With this in mind, I would definitely encourage viewing it, it’s a very enjoyable movie, and quite intelligent.  

--Santa

The Internet & Blargument: My Little Blog Post

So here we are ladies and gentlemen,  I'm here to post on something that could very possibly tear the entirety of the Internets apart: My Little Pony- Friendship is Magic (And SOPA). Yes, I know, posting about this thing can bee a sort of taboo, but I think that as readers of this blog you should be mature enough to handle this sort of situation. Oh, who am I kidding? None of you care. But, this was a topic I wanted to bring up for the longest of times, and now, I decided to interview a few of my friends to show both sides of the story. One of them is heavily against the movement, the other is a brony himself. I conducted the post over steam, so a big thanks to both Gabe Newell, and my friends.

Santa: Hello gents, thanks for joining me after that last game of LoL, remind me to physically sacrifice my computer to Satan.
Santa: So, Timmeh, whats your view on bronyism?
Timmeh: It's a drain on society.
Santa: Ah.
Santa: And you, Gioff?
Toast: Bronyism is a means to express childhood as an adult.
Santa: Very interesting, what introduced you to the movement?
Toast: I found myself drawn to it after I heard the hype...I watched a few episodes, and was absolutely addicted.
Santa: Timmeh, what makes you want to round up the herd and burn them on a pike?
Toast: It's a silly way to express a desire for the friendships many of us had as kids...
Timmeh: I don't necessarily want to burn them, I like my pony meat medium rare.
Santa: Good point, meat is expensive nowadays.
Timmeh: True.
Timmeh: I don't see much of a difference between bronyism and furryism.
Santa: Santa, your response?
Toast: Being a furry isn't a terrible thing, it's a choice. And the brony movement itself isn't hostile to you in any way, shape or form - why would you want to hurt them? Or for that matter, why would you meddle in their affairs?
Timmeh: Being a furry isn't something to be proud about, furries are trying to be something they aren't, which is pathetic on so many levels. Bronies themselves I have no problem with as long as they don't spam my message box with links to brony youtube videos and wear pony costumes.
Timmeh: Santa -.-
Santa: But timmeh, where else am I supposed to prance around in my self-made pony suit? Isn't the internet a place of free expression?
Timmeh: I meant the youtube links.
Timmeh: -.-
Santa: True, but my point is why can't bronies get an equal cut?
Santa: The internet is the final frontier of free expression,well until SOPA's passed
Timmeh: Not when so called "bronies" are forcing their culture onto other people.
Santa: The internet is the final frontier of free expression.
Timmeh: Not when so called "bronies" are forcing their culture onto other people.
Toast: They aren't, though.
Toast: In fact, it's more the other way around!
Toast: The rest of the internet sees the brony movement as foreign, new, and uninteresting
Toast: and because of that conflict of interests (as happens so often on the internet), everyone imposes their opinion upon one another.
Toast: With the bronies being but a small sliver of the massive internet pie, they face adversity wherever they go.
Toast: No brony is forcing his links in your inbox or his profile on your friends list, you don't 'have' to click the videos, nor do you have to watch them.
Santa: I wouldn't say thats true, if you go just about anywhere on the internet, bronyism is present. Deviant is full of it, boards have popped up like Ponychan, and Equestria Daily has nearly 85 million hits. I see a lot of bronies trying to "assimilate" new members into the herd, any comments on this?
Toast: It's the very same as any other growing movement - people want other people to like what they do. It's harmless to those that don't click on any of the links, and the videos are easy enough to ignore.
Santa: What about spamming?
Toast: Like I said, you can't force anyone to Ponychan or Equestria daily...
Toast: And spamming is a cancer common to all of the internet.
Timmeh: But "bronys" do spam, Santa himself, (as well as others) have spammed links into my chatbox all the while trying to deceive me into clicking them.
Santa: I'm not a good control for the average brony.
Timmeh: No one else has ever tried to do that to me, only "bronys"
Toast: That's simply because your brony friends are trolls.
Santa: Guilty as charged.
Santa: Timmeh, do you think there's anyway bronies and the other 7% of the internet could ever live in peace?
Timmeh: I would say, they are still bronys, and knowing the internet, most bronys would be trolls, since it's an internet fad.
Timmeh: I think they could live in peace with eachother Santa, if they don't try to force their mindless cute pony videos onto everyone else.
Santa: We can only hope.
Santa: One last question.
Santa: Who is the best pony?
Toast: RAINBO DUSH
Toast: WAIT
Toast: BABY PONY
Santa: That baby pony is pretty cute.
Santa: How about you Timmeh?
Timmeh left chat.
Santa: Well, thanks Toast, but we all know that Big Macintosh is the best pony.

And on that note, I bid all of you Fillies and Gentlecolts goodnight.

--Santa

Updates: Australian Christmas, Snowmedinger and Skyrim, Oh My!

Today has been a good day, people of the internet! Well, actually, yesterday was the good day, and now it’s running over into Thursday’s timeslot. But that is no reason to complain! Yes, it’s that time of year ladies and gents, we are in the middle of Christmas themed gaming.

It’s that time of year when all the big game developers make their games all warm and fuzzy on the inside.

Well, computer developers tend to. Stupid Bethesda never puts anything fun on the consoles. Or on anything.

No, instead we are now seeing eggnog potions of health in the League and Christmas crates returning in TF2. AND OH YES A NEW COMIC! NARRATED BY THE ENGINEER NONE THE LESS!

I get quite excited when my favorite Texan starts telling me the stories of old Nick, and how he gets into silly little fights with the mafia. But, you know what that means: new hats. Robin Walker & Co. decided they didn't want to go to the trouble of making hats this year (I see no reason why) and have instead let the community at large design some, and will eventually pick their favorites. In the meantime, I can only hope and dream that they give out festive keys to every little player of TF2 so we can pray for a hat. Or maybe even an unusual. Last year I got “Pink as Hell” paint and sold it off in a few minutes. I can only hope I won’t get stuck with something like the Coupe’ Disaster. Nobody wants that.

But, not to be outdone, the League is bringing back their snowy Summoner’s Rift. And to keep it fresh, they’ve made Heimerdinger into Snowmedinger. As a big fan of our little Austrian genius, I’m ready to shell out any amount of money for the cute little guy. Other things include some festive runes, and other skins (like this cute little Gangplank one) but nothing else. But, its always nice to see people gear up for the holidays.

As for Skyrim, I’m still playing. Not as much, I’ve been quite busy as of late, but I plan on grabbing the last of the Dragon Shouts that have been evading me for the last few weeks. They can’t hide forever, and I just can’t wait to be able to scream at chickens and incinerate them into my Christmas day meal. Happy holiday’s internet.

--Santa

PS: Guess who just made a GOTY poll? Vote your hearts out, internet.

The Internet: A Non-Interactive Guide

Hello fellow Internet user!

I am Santa, guide of the internet. As you may very well know, the internet is not always a very nice place. So, I’ve decided to write a few things about the internet to help YOU out! That’s right, ladies and gentlemen; you will now be able to browse the internet with ABSOLUTE EASE.

Okay, now that I’ve typed that, I’m going to stop typing with all the up-tightness. Today, internet, we will be discussing about the theories of the internet. I originally intended for this blog to be about the internet, video games, AND technology. And we’ve all seen how well I’ve been able to keep that up. BUT NO MORE! I shall continue with my explanation of the internet, and what could be a better way to start than to just talk about the wonders of the internet today. Today, we big our focus on memes. But first:

So, today’s internet is comprised of about 3-4 parts: LOL Cats, memes, trolls, and Facebook. This is all just generalized, of course. These parts full under different categories, such as:

·         Facebook: The general internet at-large. Think of sites that have nothing to do with the actual internet (IE Google, Walmart.com, Facebook)

·         LOL Cats: The generally innocent parts of the internet—think of Icanhazcheezburger. They’re here for innocent fun.

·         Memes: The fun part of the internet. This is where all of the jokes are made (for the most part) and where most online comics are (xkcd, Cyanide and Happiness, Memebase)

·         Trolls: The “bad” part of the internet lives off 10 year old lays and flat mountain dew. (Omegle, Funnyjunk)

Now, I’m not saying that “m covering all parts of the internet here. I’m not. This is PG blog after all. But the media views the lower two parts as kind of iffy. Some people think that trolls are the spawns of Satan.  Well, here’s something I’ve noticed: I find the internet to be the ONLY frontier in the world for freedom of speech. Now, I’m not campaigning for trolling, but I’ve just got to say…

Good luck trying to rid the world of it. Trolling will always be around. As will be bullying, and I use this to support my case: human nature. Humans really are (when it comes down to it) naturally cruel. Now, there are a few exceptions, I’m sure, but the idea that people think that they can just plain knock it out of existence is just insane. That’s like stating you’re going to wipe out poverty, crime, and hate. Sure, your utopia sounds all fun and great, but you really CAN’T believe it, can you?

I like to see myself as an advocate for the freedoms of the internet. And the reason I am is simple: its plain, stupid fun. The idea of memes is simply a playoff of references, and therefore makes everything simply fun.  What’s the point of “My Life is Average”? It’s evolved from average daily experiences to a full on sensation of pretty cool stories. What’s the point of memes like Chuck Testa or Paula Dean riding things? It’s hilariously stupid. It’s a cute little joke to everyone who’s seen it, bringing people together who know the references.

Memes are eventually destroyed by time. They lose their luster. I thought the Chuck Testa meme got old after two days, but every time I see a reference of taking an arrow to the knee, I still find myself laughing.

I could go on about the old memes for years, but I get the feeling a 10,000 word post won’t get me anywhere. So, I’ll end it on this note: keep the internet a place of freedom-- it’s one thing when someone is slander someone it’s another when someone is just lightly poking fun. Do we really want our newest generation to grow up to be completely sheltered? I mean, come on, we got to teach them sometime to get a backbone, and man up. The world isn’t a hunky-dory place where everyone gets along and sing songs about happy elves.  Although, that would be interesting. Too bad it’d never work. Until then….

--Santa

Skyrim: Game of Every Year-- Since 1911

Not my character, but a pretty cool one, its his.

You thought I was done, didn't you? WRONG! I'm here to continue on about my impressions about the greatest game of all time, beating up Arkham City pretty hard by so far winning both the Inside Gaming GOTY award and now Spike TV's GOTY award.

Seems like my brother's prediction's may be a bit off, eh?

In any case, I want to continue on talking about some of the features in Skyrim that just makes it well, better. Its taken huge strides since Oblivion, and feels like a completely new game. 

But is this necescarily a good thing?

So, on my main account I've logged around 63 hours. I have 19/20 shouts (and 47 out of 60 words), I've destroyed Alduin, stopped a civil war, killed an emporer, become the archmage, and become a werewolf. 

Not to mention the 37 or so dragon's I've vanquished, or the 17 poor defenseless bunnies I've slaughtered, or the 76 nirnroots I've mindlessly plucked from the ground. I've spent a miniscule amount of time in Skyrim compared to Oblivion, but here I am, done with 3 major quest-lines, and close to done with 5. The game moves fast, which is something I like, but I still find it irking that I have only so little time put into it and I've accomplished so much. I'm only level 36, what will I be doing at 47?

Now, it is true that I have been really only focusing on doing questlines, I will admit, I finished the Alduin quest in 4 days because I rushed it. But, that doesn't mean that it couldn't be longer. I have ten and a half million misclaneous quests, but the main dragon story is only 10 hours long? Seems a little obtuse. When am I ever going to actually remember to bring that mammoth tusk to that one guy? Or find gold ore? It just builds. I'll get to them when I have absolutlely NOTHING left to do. I'll probably have all of the crimson nirnroots by then, god forbid. 

The other problem (which is true with every game put out by Bethesda) is bugs. I've been stuck on one part of the Thieves Guild quest for so long that I just gave up and made a new character. It just wasn't worth it. There are other points where I cry with laughter, like using revive on a dragon's skeleton. IT's really quite hilarious. Although these quirks are nice at times, the pro's do not outqeigh the con's.

Overall, Skyrim truly is a remarkable game, that pushes everything to preform a little bit better to keep up with the status quo. It does deserve game of the year because of its changes, but it shouldn't be hailed as perfect since it isn't, but no game ever has, or will ever be. But, until then I have Skyrim. And TF2. And League of Legends. Toontown...

Until next time,

--Santa

TF2: How the Mannconomy Changed our Little Game

So as a frequent reader of this blog may tell you, (which I don't there are any,) that I enjoy hats. I am a connoisseur oh hats. Want to know how to make a game better? Hats. Yes, I can be completely obsessed with hats at times, I know, but I wasn’t truly attached to TF2 until I started trading, and I think it would be a touching story to tell all of you.

So, I when reading the blog when the Mannconomy update was released, I mean really, I had just randomly decided to go to the TF2 blog when it aired. It was pretty cool. I learned about vintages, and I instantly saw my true love. 

Nothing makes me happier than a blue border.

But, at this time, I hadn't started playing TF2 hard-core. I still had my horrid little computer, and about a gig's worth of updating to do, but something convinced me: the aspect of an Engineer hat.

So, about a week into the mannconomy update, I decided to put on my gaming pants, and started my 4 hour download into the world of mannconomics. What followed was a shallow goal: Acquire an engineer hat, anyway possible. I had 2 refined, a V. Gentleman's Gatsby, and a W. Noble Amassment of Hats. (For all of you non-traders out there, V stands for vintage, and NV. non-vintage. A vintage item was an item received before the mannconomy update, its simple mannconomics.)

So, I ended up selling my V.  Gatsby for a key, (There was a powerjack in the crate) and I forget what I sold my V. Amassment for, but all I remember is trying to get that metal. For whatever godforsaken reason I thought that crafting my hat was the best idea. So, I sold just about everything I had to get it. So, when I finally got that 4th refined and my Engy token, it really was a big moment for me. I was literally happy with any hat for the Engineer, except like the mining light or the Safe'n'Sound. But, I was excited.

3...

2..

1...

New Hat Created!

You found: Horrific Headsplitter!

That's right-- I made a butcher's knife covered in blood, for all classes. This was my crowning achievement. I was ready to explode into a fit of QQ induced rage. Of all the times to craft a hat. I crafted it during the Halloween update, and for whatever reason, my Engineer token, supposedly guaranteeing a 100% chance of Engy-hat goodness had given me this blood covered piece of multi-class bullshit. Well, I was mad as hell, and wasn't going to take it anymore. Trading had made me lose my hats, it was going ot get me them back.

I started trading full-time for about a 4 month period. I started out by getting rid of this abhorrent thing that had dashed my dreams of hat-filled goodness. I started hitting the trade servers and yelled out my demands, looking for anyone who may be interested. And then, one man trades me saying:

"HAY MAN WHAT U WANT FOR THAT THING?"

"Well, I'm really looking for an Engineer hat"

"HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM... ALL I GOT IS THIS"

He adds a V. Hotrod, I can only try typo hold in my girly squeals of delight.

"This works well with me."

"ALL RIGHT'

Trade Accepted.

 SUCCESS! Oh yes, this was the beginning of my 500 hour trading palooza. I didn’t play on my Xbox for a good 2 months at the peak. I had one goal: collect the best hats for all of the classes, not a full set, but my favorite. My other goal: bills and buds. For whatever reason, I was never truly concerned about the unusual market, it was usually out of reach, at my height, I only owned 2 pairs of buds, and I was a stupid child, and sold one pair for a very inexpensive price. But now, I think I could possibly be done with trading. I had 3 different runs on trading, all leading me up to my final backpack, which I’m happy with. I used to own buds, but, well, I sold them for New Vegas. I know it’s a bit on the low side, but the guy wanted them, and I didn’t really look at the value tables. And then the dual misc slot update. There really is no justice.

However, I have to say, I am proud of how far I’ve come with the time I’ve spent. I have a hat for every single class, I have the two rarest vintage miscellaneous items, and I even have a bear. What more could I ask for?  Well, I suppose a free Hat of Undeniable Wealth and Respect would be nice, but I can’t have it all. My dream has come much farther than I ever dreamt, and has taken much longer, too. As a piece of advice for all of you inspiring traders out there I put together a list of things that could very well help you:

·         Don’t trade with your heart. Yes, some hats are cool, but if it’s a good trade, take it, you can get the hat back.

·         Set yourself a goal. If it’s unusual, cool. If it’s something simple like a jackhammer, I think you may be missing the point. But, use it as a tool of motivation, it really helps when you have something like the Whiskered Gentleman dangling around in front of your face for motivation

·         The one thing I have always believed is that vintage WILL go up. And for the most part, it has. Be wary of the newest hats, they’ll fluxgate to a high price, and go down to nothing after a month. Scarcity causes a scare.

·         There are three ranks of values in Trading: Bills, buds, Unusual. I never broke that unusual barrier, but once you break one, you’re in that tire, it’s a big experience.

For all of you gamers, geeks, and random assortment of internet dwellers out there, good night. I have things to do, like watch the IGA’s. If Skyrim doesn’t win, the progress is rigged.

--Santa