Well Founded Conspiracies theories

I got to admit, Its not that big of a year for gaming, if you compare it to last year. We were rocked by a bunch of major titles—ranging from Portal 2 to Skyrim, and some titles I forgot about (and didn’t necessarily play) like dead Space 2. So, I’m looking at this New Year, and I’m think: what is there to really look forward to? Halo 4, which I’m really not going to get into, I don’t really count a December release as part of 2012’s glamour, I’ll be into 2013 when I really like it. I can really only think of Bioshock: Infinite as the main title that’s in October, but still that’s all I can really think of. So, I’d like to speculate some titles which are wholly possible—and might be announced at this year’s biggest game show.

For all of you who don’t know what the Electronic Entertainment Expo (or E3) is, then you’re either a casual gamer, or maybe a new gamer; but let me summarize it like this: it’s the biggest nerd-fest outside of Comic Con. E3—which used to be a big, wide-open, sweaty gamer’s paradise is now closed to the public. This however does not mean you can’t go (you can if you have $995 burning a big hole in your pocket) you can watch the events on G4 (the “video game” channel) or via YouTube (Machinima streams it.) E3 is filled with wondrous tables of the biggest gigs in gaming. Everyone goes to flaunt what they’ve got—from Nintendo to Telltale Games to Valve. Companies like nVidia and IGN come out as well; they’ve got a big pull in this market. The biggest events lay in the biggest companies. The big 3 (Sony, Microsoft and Nintendo) hold a gigantic press conference, showing what we can expect in the year to come, this is when consoles are unveiled (like possibly the new Xbox this year) and some new flagship games (like Halo games, Reach was announced a few years ago here).

Conferences are what make it—it’s not just the big 3. Activision and EA come out to show their superiority. Last year, Valve was slanted to make an appearance, but they canceled their conference at the last moment (probably since Gabe Newell was already showing up at the Sony conference.) but, this is what I’m predicting as the 3 biggest players of E3 this year.

3—Nintendo: I’m hoping to see something like Pikmin 3, or a new Smash Bros., something that can make the Wii U look more impressive than it already is.

2—Microsoft: This is the big year for Microsoft—announcing Halo 4 was big, but they need something bigger than that, Kinect kind of flopped out, but that doesn’t mean they can’t build off of it. We’re going to see a large ceremony, some pomp and circumstance, with a new console, maybe not a release date, but a new face to put both Nintendo and Sony on edge.

1—Valve: Yes, they have released that they aren’t giving us any games at E3, but there is still hope yet for our truly beloved. Valve’s been giving cute little signs, like a photo in their employee handbook, the joke of Half-Life 3D, the 7 years since Episode 2, its all coming up to this. Valve is going to show us something so magnificent that everyone at whichever game conference literally explodes with anticipation. I’m not expecting a release date, if it comes with one, it’ll be in 2014, but I’m expecting a little tiny tease. Gabe Newell controls the world of PCs with Steam, and since new consoles are being slated for release, I think it’s logical to have the most wanted game in all of recorded history there as a reminder.

Am I being a bit on the hopeful side? Oh yes, but why shouldn’t I be. For me, this year will have something from Valve—they’re changing their image from the company of few games to more and more. We’ve had constant releases from them for a long time now: Alien Swarm, Dota 2, Portal 2, left 4 Dead 2, Counterstrike: Global offense it’s been very constant, so why stop now? I’ll be honest; I don’t care as much about the whole new consoles business as I do care about the new Half-Life idea.

--Santa

Single Player Extrvaganza

Let’s talk about something that is sure to get every gamers blood boiling.

Episode 3.

For those of you who have no idea what I’m talking about, go ahead and take your leave, why are you even on this blog? This is a blog about GAMES and occasionally the INTERNET. And memes, I suppose. Everything on this blog is a joke anyway. Even the web address. Go download The Orange Box for $20 off of Steam, you’ll thank me later.

In any case, I bring this up for one reason, my brother’s insistent nagging that Valve NEEDS to release Half Life 2: Episode 3. It is their DUTY as a video game publisher to release their flagship game a new update. This got me to thinking. Half-Life was originally released in 1998 for the PC. In 2006, 8 years later, we got Half-Life 2. Over the course of a year, we got the two episodes (with Episode 2 being released on October 10^th, 2007) Here we are, 5 years later, and still not even a hint at Episode 3. Here’s my idea.

There is no Episode 3.

But, instead, there is a Half-Life 3. Think about it. Valve works on Valve time, but that does not mean that it takes them 5 years to make an episode. It took them 7 or so months to do it beforehand. I can only conclude that given the amount of time elapsed, that this can really be the only reasonable solution. But, given this, I also think it will probably take about 8 years, maybe longer, to finish HL3. Valve won’t even talk about it if it isn’t up to Gabe’s insanely high standards, and that’s what gave us Half-Life in the first place.

I have no problem with waiting for Half-Life 3 mostly because it’s one of the few game series that are single player that I will play. I like the challenge that Half-Life gives, but I know why it gives the challenge—quality control. Does this mean that I don’t hope that Half-Life comes out in a blaze of glory at E3 this year? Of course not. But, it won’t happen. Sorry guys, I think it’s possible we may hear Valve tease us this year with a smidge of the goatee that Freeman eludes us with, but it isn’t coming for another couple of years. Hang in there kiddos, we’re all hoping for the same thing.

--Santa

A Look Into the Greastest Game Of All Time, Part I

Ladies and Gentleman, this is going to be an opinionated post, for those of the faint of heart, you may want to close this now, for I have found the greatest game of all time, and to put it a step above, its free. That's right, ladies and gentlemen, for a whopping $000 and 000 cents, you can now start to play Valve Software's greatest accomplishment: Team Fortress 2.For those of you whom may not have heard of this accomplishment in gaming, you can quickly run over to their blog: http://teamfortress.com/ for their new updates, most of which I will cover on this blog, but onto the main point, the game itself, a synopsis, and its versatility, this will be my first review of a game.


Team Fortress 2 is the child of Valve Software's creative team, headed by Robin Walker, the creator of the original mod for the Half-Life engine. The game is a class-based, cell-shaded, war game based on 1950's era art style. The game play is fluid, the artwork is fluid, and enough jokes and references to shake a stick at. But, best of all, Valve constantly updates the game, adding weapons for their nine characters (whom I will get to very shortly) which have various effects, from flamethrowers to mini-guns rocket launchers to shovels. Team Fortress 2 adds the idea of using everything but the kitchen sink as a weapon, some in the original style, some in a new futuristic style from other games, making TF2 a truly unique system.


To acquire items you can wait, receiving an item from the randomized drop system every hour or so until you hit the weekly cap of items. You can craft items, as newer items have a "blueprint” for crafting it or you can trade. But, trading's true value lies in one of TF2's greatest strength: customization of your character, in the form of hats. Hats range from a humble fedora for the spy to a Max's head (from the Sam & Max series) for all 9 classes. Some hats also have unusual effects, like an orbiting heart, sunbeams, and of course, flames.
For the main event, you have the classes. You have 9 classes, covering all of the forms of combat you could ever want, broken up into 3 categories: Offense, Defense, and Support.


On support, you have the Scout, first and foremost, a fast little guy from Boston. Out of all the classes, he runs the fastest, and has the biggest egos.  His greatest advantages are for “capping” the Intel, a variant of Capture the flag, capping control points, where he counts as two people, and generally annoying all classes, although he can’t take as much of a punch as most of the other classes, he still has the ability to be strong in a fight.


The Soldier, also known as Mr. Jane Doe, is slower than the average class, but a bit stockier in return. He comes with a rocket launcher, and the ability to be a game changer. The soldier’s primary objective is to destroy building, built by engineers, and to break up medics from their healing targets, (both of which are to be covered later.)


The Pyro, a mostly unknown class, has the power set things on fire with a fairly large ranged flame thrower, another item that he can get is the flare gun, giving him the power to shot flares, and cause burn damage, allowing the Pyro the chance at the kill even if the target gets away. His main objective is mostly checking for spies, general offense in war, and to be a watchdog for Engineers. Int part II, I'll finish the explanations of all classes, and get into the multiple game modes and user-made content.